Leaving It In The Hands of God...

So Farry ended up calling me yesterday to come into work. I can’t tell you how excited I was to get out of the house! I was hoping she would call me this weekend so I could show her how dependable I could be to come in at a moments notice. And that’s what it turned out to be. I was heading down to feed the horses and she called and she wanted me to be there in an hour and a half. Now understand I was all gross! I needed to get a shower so bad! I think I took my shortest shower ever. I was in and out in like five minutes! It’s a thirty minute drive there (and I like to get there a little early) so I only had an hour to get ready. There were other things I could’ve done at the house, but I knew work was more important. She was so happy I was going to be able to come in for her.

So I got there ten minutes early and the store wasn’t busy at all! I figured on a Saturday the store would be packed, but to no avail. She said they had been incredibly slow all day and she had hardly sold a thing. That is so unusual for her. So we went over everything that had happened that day and the day before. She pointed out that if I had shown the right shoes to her friend I could have made the sell on Thursday so I was really bummed about that. I was ready to do some big selling last night. The store stayed kind of busy but no one wanted to buy anything and it was so frustrating. I did manage to sell one pair of jeans at $130.00 and I was really excited about that. There was also this other girl that came up and she tried on several pair of jeans. We got up to the cash register and I told her the total and she changed her mind. Now I’m trying to be understanding about the fact that the clothes in our store are expensive, but this girl knew that while she was trying them on. So that was my total for the night and Farry had wanted me to sell around $300.00 worth so I didn’t even make half. I had prayed so hard that the Lord would really send me the business last night, but for whatever reason it just wasn’t happening.

I did sleep in incredibly late yesterday. Once again I didn’t sleep well with Danny being gone and once he got home I was out! I guess I just need him beside me to really sleep well. I didn’t cook anything yesterday because I knew we had dinner from the night before. I didn’t have time to eat before I left for work and I knew that I would be starving by the time the store closed. Sure enough, Taco Bueno was still opened so I stopped and got me a party burrito which is what I always get. I pulled over in the parking lot because I knew it wouldn’t be safe for me to be driving down the road trying to eat it. When I got home I was still hungry so I heated me up some chicken noodles and ate an orange. Not the greatest combination in the world, but it satisfied me.

Today I got up and went to church like a good girl. Pastor Don has been teaching out of Hebrews and it’s been amazing. We have question and answer time after the message but he explains it so well that anymore I don’t have any questions. I just sit there amazed at what God is teaching me through his messages. We did have some visitors today and that got me really excited. Our church needs to grow and I’ve really been praying about that here lately. I love the fact that we have a small church, but there is still room for growth. It was a large family and they seemed to really like the message that Don gave this morning, as they kept nodding through his message. I hope they decide to come again and really see what our church is about. I know if they give it a chance they will love it as much as I do.

I came home and started feeding the animals right away. I had texted Danny last night to let him know that I hadn’t gotten a chance to feed yet before I had to leave, but he didn’t get it until he was on his way to work, so the horses didn’t get fed yesterday (poor babies!). I knew they had to be starving so I changed into something warmer and headed down there. Now the other day I guess I didn’t lock the gate that goes into the tack room well enough and the horses got in and destroyed the tack room. It’s still a mess but I just didn’t feel like cleaning it up today and I wouldn’t even know where to start because it is such a disaster. After that I fed the dogs and the bunnies. We had another litter of baby bunnies but again there is no sign of them so I can only assume that they are eating their babies. This makes me so sad. I thought these rabbits would be a good way of making some side money but there is no way I could’ve known that they would eat their own babies. I think I’ve given up on the idea of them ever raising their own young. Money will have to be made elsewhere. Speaking of money and animals, we are getting serious about selling the yearling horses. We paid $800.00 a piece for them and just to get them sold we are going down to $250.00 a piece! These horses are worth so much more than that, but there just isn’t a market for them right now. If worse comes to worse we are going to donate them to a riding ministry and just get a tax deduction for them on next year’s taxes. Not what I imagined doing, but in the end if they have a good home (and they would there) I guess that’s all that matters.

Now I’m debating on whether or not I should fix me an early dinner. I’ve been eating a ton of pasta lately and I’m thinking maybe I’ll just have some leftovers. I’m not sure yet, but I know I’m getting hungry. I’m only eating one meal a day (not on purpose but I’m just not that hungry) and so I can’t figure out why I’m not losing weight. It’s getting really aggravating. I have so many clothes that I could wear if I could just go back to my smaller size, but for whatever reason I just can’t lose this weight. Half of my clothes right now are too small and it makes me want to cry. I didn’t do anything different so the only thing I can think of is some of this medicine must have made me put on some weight and it won’t let me lose it. But my biggest deal right now is being able to be productive at my job. I want to be Farry’s biggest seller, but with the store being so slow I don’t see how this can happen. I really need the Lord to help me out in this area and send me customers who are ready to buy.

I’m working again tomorrow and possibly opening and closing the store. That means I will be there from 9:45 in the morning until 9:15 at night. That will be a long day especially if the store is slow. There is only so much you can clean in a store as small as ours. I’m praying that tomorrow I can sell around $700.00 worth. That’s a big goal and hopefully with the Lord’s help I can surpass that goal. I know if I did Farry would be so excited! I don’t know how to make me a better sales person but if the Lord is willing I know I can do it. Well I guess I better get off here and eat something. My stomach is growling and letting me know it’s time to eat. Hopefully I’ll get in the mood to do something around the house because I haven’t done a thing today. It’s been a lazy day outside of church and I need to get something accomplished. I think Danny’s given up on having clean socks folded and ready for him in his drawer. I need to do so much especially since I’ll be working Monday and Tuesday. Please be in prayer that I can sell more than I could ever hope to. I need to show Farry that I can handle a business especially since she is wanting to make me the manager of the plus size boutique when it opens this summer. I’m still praying about that because that means I would have to work full time but I’m leaving it and everything else in the hands of God. He will show me the path He wants me to take!

Melissa Fitzwilliam