I Do Mean Well

I’m feeling somewhat insensitive today and for that I also feel guilty. A friend of mine is having some “issues”. She wants to cry on my shoulder because of all her woes and lay the blame at other people’s feet, but can’t seem to take any responsibility for her own actions. She stated, in fact, that she can’t see anything she’s done wrong, and I could sit down and give her a whole list. Not very friend-like I know. However, when people fight rarely is it only one persons fault. I think a certain amount of blame can be laid at both sets of feet. I would say this if I hadn’t been in a similar situation myself. But I have been and I have my own share of faults that I’m not proud of. I understand that it may take some time to see the full depth of your own mistakes, but surely you’re able to take some responsibility for the current state of affairs. It truly is a rarity to find one person completely blameless in dramatic situations. I have a hard time giving out advice when one person won’t own up to their own mistakes. To be honest I even have a hard time being sympathetic. Take responsibility; try looking at your own flaws although it can be hard. God is able to change you and your heart. We all sin, it’s just a fact of life, but you truly do need to take the log out of your eye before you start pointing out the spec in your brother’s eye. There is no shame in admitting your faults, but rather freedom. Maybe it takes a person being fully convinced of God’s grace to be able to do this, I’m not sure. But I do know that the inability to do so means you are being prideful. God points these issues out to humble your heart and bring you closer to Him. Be willing to be broken, only to be made new and better in the long run. It’s all a part of God’s great plan for your life and He does know what’s best for you. Take courage in Him because this trial is not the end. He has great things planned for all of us. I wish I could share this with my friend right now, but she’s not open to it. She’s drowning herself in a pity party of her own making. That’s not to say she doesn’t have a reason to be upset because she does! But flaunting the other person’s mistakes in front of ALL people makes her no better. Oh, how I wish she could see this! All I can do for the moment is offer my prayers for this situation because I promise she doesn’t want to hear what I really have to say! She wants to remain the victim and I have a hard time with that. Oh, well I’ve done all I can do or all I am willing to do. So until she changes or my hearts changes I’m afraid the situation will stay the same. Maybe I'm not the greatest friend, but I do mean well.

Melissa Fitzwilliam