Every Moment
By: Joy Williams
We laughed out loud ‘til we cried
And the tears were sweet
Midnight melted to morning
A moment faded to memory
All these days
They just slip away through our fingers
So…
Don’t let go
Hold onto every moment
Always know
Hold onto every moment that You can
We move on with no regrets to our destiny
Held by the hands of the Father
We share His love and He leads us through
All these days
They just slip away through our fingers
So…
Don’t let go
Hold onto every moment
Always know
Hold onto every moment that You can
Running through yesterday into tomorrow
Don’t let it just drift away
Forget about tying the hands of time
Give every minute to the One who gave us today
Don’t let go
Hold onto every moment
Always know
Hold onto every moment that You can
Well today is Ciara’s first day of junior high (7th grade) and Shay’s last first day of school as she is a senior this year. I spent the morning praying for all of our girls that the Lord would guide them and protect them. I thanked Him for choosing me to be the one to guide them here on this earth. It just amazes me how fast the time has flown by. I blinked for just a moment and they grew up. How does it happen so fast?! I try to hold fast to the moments but they slip away like water in my hand. The years seem to go by faster with each passing year. Time is flying by so fast that I can’t keep up with it. The tears I cried this morning were bitter sweet; bitter in the fact that they are getting so big, but sweet in the fact that they are getting so big lol. God has blessed us with four amazing girls and I stand in awe of Him and them.
Yesterday is but a memory, tomorrow is uncertain, but today I will cherish with all that I have. We are chained to time and while it grips us we are under its power. It can be cruel and sweet as it is this morning. Time is a friend and an enemy all in the same moment. One day we will be free from the constraints of time, but until that day comes I will cling to my memories and my moments with all that I have. As Ciara was getting ready this morning I was praying for time to slow down, so I could enjoy each second that we had together. Now I am praying for it to speed up so I can see how her day was (and Shay too!!!). Well speaking of time, it’s time for me to get ready for work. It’s only 9:00 in the morning but freight has been coming in early and I want to get there as soon as possible so I can get Ciara after school. I pray for you all and lift you up in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. He is such a good God and the Holy Spirit is with us always. He binds us together as a family in His amazing love. Don’t let today slip away without finding moments to cherish.
Melissa Fitzwilliam
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
God's Moving!!! (can you feel Him?)
Life has been so busy lately but in a good way. We took a trip to Missouri to look at dump trucks and I think we may have found one! It was a fun trip with Rick and Kathy and she kept me laughing the entire time. I think we have found us some good, honest workers, but better than that I think we have found some great lifelong friends! Rick is so knowledgeable about machinery and so is Kathy! We value their opinion and really lean on them to guide us in this search. I have been praying that God would bring us to the right truck! We do need to get this business up and running though and get some money coming in! Things are getting tight again, but I know God has everything under control. While the company on the trip was great, one of the places we stayed left much lacking!!!! It was a dive if I’ve ever seen one, but it was our only option at the time. I learned a valuable lesson that you ask to see the rooms before you agree to pay to stay there!! We also learned to take more clothes than you think you need. We took one day’s change of clothes thinking we would be back the next day. However what started to be a one day trip turned into a four day trip!! We had to go to Wal-Mart and buy us clothes to make it through the trip. However, through all the bumps along the way it was a good trip.
This coming weekend will be tax-free weekend here in Oklahoma. All clothes and school supplies will be tax free from Friday to Sunday. What this means for me is I will work this past Tuesday to next Friday without a day off. This weekend I will be back on the floor working with the customers. They say to be prepared for a crazy weekend! We’ve been told to wear comfortable shoes because we won’t be getting breaks. However, we are all bringing something on Saturday for a Mexican day and as time permits we will be running back to the stock room to stuff our faces and run back on the floor. I’m so glad I like the people that I work with otherwise this could be very miserable. I just saw the weather forecast and it will be in the 100’s this weekend and it’s mandatory fall dress code. What that means is jeans, no sandals, but close toed shoes, and at least three layers on top. Now yes that sounds like a lot but you can wear two tank tops and that counts as two layers. I know what jeans I’m wearing but I haven’t decided what tops I’m wearing yet. Not a big deal but still I want to be comfortable and not burning hot while I’m helping customers.
Tonight is church night and I can’t wait to see my church family. They have been such a huge support to me here recently and the love of God has just poured through them! I stand awed and humble at the people God has put in my life. We serve such an awesome God and I’m so glad to have Him as the Savior of my heart! Speaking of God Ciara went to church camp in Missouri and came back totally on fire for God!! She said she feels like she has been so fully filled by the Holy Spirit that she is amazed. She felt the Holy Spirit move during the entire trip. She has had some anger issues for awhile now and she said it was like this huge knot of anger just vanished during one of the worship sessions. She said the messages were amazing and she can’t wait to get out around people so she can show them through her life that she is a devoted child of God. My heart just overflows at this. She is even vowed to change her habits at school because she said she wasn’t honoring God in her work in years past. She wants to live for God in every way that she can think of and that means being a better daughter, a better friend, and a louder and more active living example of Christ’s great love for us. She has fallen in love with Jesus all over again and has been renewed. She has experienced a revival in her life and also His amazing grace poured out to overflowing! She is walking with Him in every way and I pray this doesn’t go away for her. My prayer is that our other girls experience this same thirst and hunger for our Savior. I also pray that He begins to renew my spirit and set me on fire as He has Ciara. Her joy for Him is contagious! I can’t wait to see what He’s going to do in her life!!!
Well I guess I better get to cleaning house. It’s a complete mess!! I’ve got a load of laundry washing now but I’ve let it build up again and it will take me a better part of a week to get it all done. (sigh) I need to start treating my house as a house of the Lord and keep it the way it deserves! My family deserves to have clean clothes, clean dishes, clean bathrooms, etc. Lord willing, He will begin a new work in me and we will all see the evidence of this in my life. I thank you all for keeping us in your prayers and ask you to continue to do so. I, also, keep you in my prayers and I am so grateful for all of you! The Lord bless you and keep you in the palm of His mighty and loving hand!!!
Melissa Fitzwilliam
This coming weekend will be tax-free weekend here in Oklahoma. All clothes and school supplies will be tax free from Friday to Sunday. What this means for me is I will work this past Tuesday to next Friday without a day off. This weekend I will be back on the floor working with the customers. They say to be prepared for a crazy weekend! We’ve been told to wear comfortable shoes because we won’t be getting breaks. However, we are all bringing something on Saturday for a Mexican day and as time permits we will be running back to the stock room to stuff our faces and run back on the floor. I’m so glad I like the people that I work with otherwise this could be very miserable. I just saw the weather forecast and it will be in the 100’s this weekend and it’s mandatory fall dress code. What that means is jeans, no sandals, but close toed shoes, and at least three layers on top. Now yes that sounds like a lot but you can wear two tank tops and that counts as two layers. I know what jeans I’m wearing but I haven’t decided what tops I’m wearing yet. Not a big deal but still I want to be comfortable and not burning hot while I’m helping customers.
Tonight is church night and I can’t wait to see my church family. They have been such a huge support to me here recently and the love of God has just poured through them! I stand awed and humble at the people God has put in my life. We serve such an awesome God and I’m so glad to have Him as the Savior of my heart! Speaking of God Ciara went to church camp in Missouri and came back totally on fire for God!! She said she feels like she has been so fully filled by the Holy Spirit that she is amazed. She felt the Holy Spirit move during the entire trip. She has had some anger issues for awhile now and she said it was like this huge knot of anger just vanished during one of the worship sessions. She said the messages were amazing and she can’t wait to get out around people so she can show them through her life that she is a devoted child of God. My heart just overflows at this. She is even vowed to change her habits at school because she said she wasn’t honoring God in her work in years past. She wants to live for God in every way that she can think of and that means being a better daughter, a better friend, and a louder and more active living example of Christ’s great love for us. She has fallen in love with Jesus all over again and has been renewed. She has experienced a revival in her life and also His amazing grace poured out to overflowing! She is walking with Him in every way and I pray this doesn’t go away for her. My prayer is that our other girls experience this same thirst and hunger for our Savior. I also pray that He begins to renew my spirit and set me on fire as He has Ciara. Her joy for Him is contagious! I can’t wait to see what He’s going to do in her life!!!
Well I guess I better get to cleaning house. It’s a complete mess!! I’ve got a load of laundry washing now but I’ve let it build up again and it will take me a better part of a week to get it all done. (sigh) I need to start treating my house as a house of the Lord and keep it the way it deserves! My family deserves to have clean clothes, clean dishes, clean bathrooms, etc. Lord willing, He will begin a new work in me and we will all see the evidence of this in my life. I thank you all for keeping us in your prayers and ask you to continue to do so. I, also, keep you in my prayers and I am so grateful for all of you! The Lord bless you and keep you in the palm of His mighty and loving hand!!!
Melissa Fitzwilliam
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
It's a Blinding Lost....
I wish I could say things are getting easier, but I can’t. I wish I could say I felt better and I’m seeing things in a positive light, but I can’t. I have some many questions that are racing through my mind with no answers to be found. I’m so frustrated right now and I can’t vent to Anita until Thursday. Speaking of Thursday, Ciara is going to start seeing Anita Thursday too. I think she’s to that age that she struggles going back and forth between houses and just other stuff that pre-teens go through, that I think she needs someone she can confide in. I think she will love Anita the way I do! The one problem is that while I vent to Anita, there are some things that you still don’t have answers to. It’s just waiting to see what God has in store for you. Today I’m anxious. I’m anxious for so many reasons...none of which I can share. But I can tell you I have felt your prayers and they have lifted my spirits. Even with me being so low right now I take courage in the fact you love me enough to pray for things that are unknown to you but still concern me none the less. I’m encouraged by the love of God pouring through you all.
I’m gonna keep this one short because there are things I need to get done. The most encouraging news is I’m back to work after being off for a week. I missed that place so much!!! I know I have said it before but I love that place and also the people I work for and with!! I’m am doing freight now rather than selling out on the floor. I unpack all the clothes that come in each day and put security sensors on them and get them ready to go out on the floor. It can be a tedious job but I still love it. What I’m missing right now is doing some serious writing. I don’t write poems anymore, or heartfelt blurbs, and I rarely get to blog anymore. It feels like the writer inside of me is asleep. It’s not a good sleep, but a restless slumber that’s deep and dark. Now please don’t mistake this as a trip down depression lane! I think I’m just under so much stress that it doesn’t evoke in me the desire to write. And while I love work, I still don’t feel completely fulfilled. I think what I’m lacking is a deeper walk with God. I don’t journal my prayers anymore, and to be honest praying is coming really hard for me right now and has for some time now. I know Christ has torn down the veil that keep me from God, but it feels like there is this wall, maybe a ceiling, that makes my prayers bounce off and return to me unanswered. I don’t feel worthy enough to come to God right now. I know none of us are worthy, but this is something more. I know I’m doing a poor job at explaining it, but it’s hard to explain when I don’t fully understand it myself.
I need to just jump in and start prayer journaling again and doing my daily walk with Him. He seems so far and I feel so lost. It’s a blinding lost. It’s so foggy you are unsure what the next step has in store for you. After reading this again I think this is something Anita needs to see because while there is still so much left unsaid, I have explained it better here than I’ve been able to just sit and think through. I guess I need to get off here and call my ex so I can pick up Ciara tomorrow. She won’t be home long because she is going to church camp this next week. I pray she has a good time and finds a deeper walk with Christ while she’s there. Please continue your prayers because we’re still stumbling our way along. One misstep and I fear I will fall apart. Thank you for listening to my ramblings and also thank you for your prayers. I have faith that they are not going unheard.
Melissa Fitzwilliam
I’m gonna keep this one short because there are things I need to get done. The most encouraging news is I’m back to work after being off for a week. I missed that place so much!!! I know I have said it before but I love that place and also the people I work for and with!! I’m am doing freight now rather than selling out on the floor. I unpack all the clothes that come in each day and put security sensors on them and get them ready to go out on the floor. It can be a tedious job but I still love it. What I’m missing right now is doing some serious writing. I don’t write poems anymore, or heartfelt blurbs, and I rarely get to blog anymore. It feels like the writer inside of me is asleep. It’s not a good sleep, but a restless slumber that’s deep and dark. Now please don’t mistake this as a trip down depression lane! I think I’m just under so much stress that it doesn’t evoke in me the desire to write. And while I love work, I still don’t feel completely fulfilled. I think what I’m lacking is a deeper walk with God. I don’t journal my prayers anymore, and to be honest praying is coming really hard for me right now and has for some time now. I know Christ has torn down the veil that keep me from God, but it feels like there is this wall, maybe a ceiling, that makes my prayers bounce off and return to me unanswered. I don’t feel worthy enough to come to God right now. I know none of us are worthy, but this is something more. I know I’m doing a poor job at explaining it, but it’s hard to explain when I don’t fully understand it myself.
I need to just jump in and start prayer journaling again and doing my daily walk with Him. He seems so far and I feel so lost. It’s a blinding lost. It’s so foggy you are unsure what the next step has in store for you. After reading this again I think this is something Anita needs to see because while there is still so much left unsaid, I have explained it better here than I’ve been able to just sit and think through. I guess I need to get off here and call my ex so I can pick up Ciara tomorrow. She won’t be home long because she is going to church camp this next week. I pray she has a good time and finds a deeper walk with Christ while she’s there. Please continue your prayers because we’re still stumbling our way along. One misstep and I fear I will fall apart. Thank you for listening to my ramblings and also thank you for your prayers. I have faith that they are not going unheard.
Melissa Fitzwilliam
Sunday, July 18, 2010
God's Great Love Poured Out In Visible Form!!!
It’s kind of a hard weekend…there’s been a roller coaster of emotions. I keep telling myself that God is faithful and His hand is guiding all that we do. But it’s been hard. There is so much that I want to share with you, to vent, but I can’t. The tears well up, but won’t come. There’s a knot in my throat that just won’t go away. It’s not like I’m trying not to cry, I just can’t. I hate it when it does that. I feel like I need a good cry and I’m wondering if my medicine keeps me from crying, but I’m not for sure. I need a shoulder to cry on but what I’m learning is there are just some things that shouldn’t be shared. So I cry (or read complain) to God. He already knows everything, even things I don’t know. But what I do know is no matter how are you try to hide a sin, God will bring it to the light. He is really working on us right now, and while I know it’s for His glory, it’s still a painful process.
I don’t remember if I shared about mini-church on Friday night, but it was a very uplifting time. Mini-church is a dinner fellowship we have once a month for the adults and we get together, eat an awesome dinner (this time is was potluck), and have a message out of the Word. This time we were sharing what God was working on in our lives. I’m not sure if everyone knows about our current problem in the church so I didn’t share anything, but I did cry. Not hard uncontrollable tears, but soft tears of joy and sadness all at the same time. The message really spoke to me and the people who do know about our current problem just rallied around me and let me know how much they love me and how they are praying for us both. The support there is awe-inspiring!!! The outpouring of love is humbling! It’s God’s love poured out in visible form. It is what we need at this point in time and it’s what we have.
Other than that it’s been a relatively calm weekend. I’ve just been spending lots of time with Danny and doing some deep conversing. We’ve shared much this weekend and actually over this past week. We’ve sought each other’s forgiveness in various areas and in many ways poured our hearts out to each other. Man, I have so much on my heart that I desire to share with you!!! But out of respect for the situation it’s just not something I can do. Just know we need your continued prayers!!!
Pastor Don and Jean are coming over tonight to visit with us for awhile so I worked around the house today. I got quite a bit accomplished, but not near what I needed to get done. I just don’t have it in me right now. I know they will understand. We also may have some of the other church people coming over to see us and I welcome them with open arms! The phone calls haven’t stopped coming in with words of encouragement, love, and support. They are touching!!
I would like to go swimming in our new pool, but it turned green yesterday and we don’t have enough shock to get it to where I can vacuum it right now. We have so many errands to run and appointments to keep and I start back to work tomorrow. We only have one car right now because Danny’s truck is being fixed from the hail damage. I don’t know how we are going to juggle all of this but Pastor Don has already offered to take Danny where ever he may need to go so that will be incredibly helpful.
Well I guess I better run because my man is hungry and looking for something to eat. I’m getting a little hungry myself…this is a rare thing now days as I’ve had no appetite to eat anything. I keep thinking maybe I’ll drop a few pounds like I need to, but this isn’t the way to do it. Know my love goes out to you all and my prayers rise to heaven for you. Thank you in advance for your prayers and know you mean so much to me!!!
Melissa Fitzwilliam
I don’t remember if I shared about mini-church on Friday night, but it was a very uplifting time. Mini-church is a dinner fellowship we have once a month for the adults and we get together, eat an awesome dinner (this time is was potluck), and have a message out of the Word. This time we were sharing what God was working on in our lives. I’m not sure if everyone knows about our current problem in the church so I didn’t share anything, but I did cry. Not hard uncontrollable tears, but soft tears of joy and sadness all at the same time. The message really spoke to me and the people who do know about our current problem just rallied around me and let me know how much they love me and how they are praying for us both. The support there is awe-inspiring!!! The outpouring of love is humbling! It’s God’s love poured out in visible form. It is what we need at this point in time and it’s what we have.
Other than that it’s been a relatively calm weekend. I’ve just been spending lots of time with Danny and doing some deep conversing. We’ve shared much this weekend and actually over this past week. We’ve sought each other’s forgiveness in various areas and in many ways poured our hearts out to each other. Man, I have so much on my heart that I desire to share with you!!! But out of respect for the situation it’s just not something I can do. Just know we need your continued prayers!!!
Pastor Don and Jean are coming over tonight to visit with us for awhile so I worked around the house today. I got quite a bit accomplished, but not near what I needed to get done. I just don’t have it in me right now. I know they will understand. We also may have some of the other church people coming over to see us and I welcome them with open arms! The phone calls haven’t stopped coming in with words of encouragement, love, and support. They are touching!!
I would like to go swimming in our new pool, but it turned green yesterday and we don’t have enough shock to get it to where I can vacuum it right now. We have so many errands to run and appointments to keep and I start back to work tomorrow. We only have one car right now because Danny’s truck is being fixed from the hail damage. I don’t know how we are going to juggle all of this but Pastor Don has already offered to take Danny where ever he may need to go so that will be incredibly helpful.
Well I guess I better run because my man is hungry and looking for something to eat. I’m getting a little hungry myself…this is a rare thing now days as I’ve had no appetite to eat anything. I keep thinking maybe I’ll drop a few pounds like I need to, but this isn’t the way to do it. Know my love goes out to you all and my prayers rise to heaven for you. Thank you in advance for your prayers and know you mean so much to me!!!
Melissa Fitzwilliam
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Thank You In Advance For Your Prayers....
So I wrote a little something last night, but I thought I would get on here and thank everyone again for their prayers. What makes me sad is I can praise God in the good times but I have a hard time praising Him in the bad times. I keep questioning Him why these things had to happen like He owes me some explanation but He doesn’t. In many ways I feel like Job right now. We are going through so many hard trials (don’t get me wrong it’s nothing like Job went through) and I keep thinking why? Since I believe in predestination I have to know that God has this problem already worked out although I can’t see it. He is a good God all the time and He wouldn’t allow something to happen to us that won’t turn out for our good and that He won’t get the praise for in the end. I have to take courage in this because it seems like the only thing I have to hold on too right now is His love and promises.
Ok now in other news…I think we have decided to keep Hannah!!! She has found her way into our hearts and I just can’t bear to part with her! Our doctor tried taking her but I guess his dog about tore her up so he said it just wasn’t a good fit. She was so happy to be home and I missed her so much for her only being gone for two days!!! I think we are still getting Aniyah (the red doxie) and I need to start looking for her. I want to potty train them both at the same time! And I’m also hoping that Elowyn takes to Aniyah like she is one of her own pups. Also in dog news, Edom and Rukka attacked our neighbor’s dog yesterday!!! They really tore that little guy up!!! Our neighbor is so mad right now and to be honest he has every right to be!!! He has now said that if our dogs go on his property that he will shoot them. Again he has every right to do that and as responsible dog owners we have to keep our dogs contained within our property. So we have to go buy a big dog pen because we have three really big dogs. For the moment they are staying locked up in the entry way of the house. I have to say they really don’t feel like they are being punished because they are in the cool of the house rather than the sweltering heat of the outside sun.
Also….Danny has really been hurting bad lately. He struggles with debilitating pain on a daily basis. He goes back to see his pain specialist and they are talking about doing some kind of internal implant that will vibrate his nerve endings and that will take away the pain. To be honest we have heard some really bad things about this device. It’s battery operated and so every so often you have to go back in for another surgery to replace the batteries. Danny doesn’t want anymore surgeries and I can’t say I blame him. But they have to figure out something to do for his pain. He has decided that pain pills are not an option because they can be so addictive. I think he made the right decision but there has to be some answer out there for his pain. I pray constantly that God will heal him from this pain, but this may be the thorn in his flesh. So please be praying for his pain. He isn’t sleeping at night and is also keeping me awake as he wants me to rub his neck and his lower back. Poor baby, he’s being such a trooper trying to deal with this but I know it wears on him.
I guess that’s all for now. I’ll try really hard not to stay gone so long. I looked at the blog site and I only did one post in June and so far this will be my second one in July. I use to post 30+ blogs a month when I was staying at home! I miss it so much!! Now I need to get up and do some cleaning! The house is a mess and it’s my own fault. I haven’t used my washer and dryer very much and the laundry is piling up again!! I wish I was a clean freak, but alas that is not how God made me lol!!! I’m lifting you all up in prayer and my love goes out to you all!!!
Melissa Fitzwilliam
Ok now in other news…I think we have decided to keep Hannah!!! She has found her way into our hearts and I just can’t bear to part with her! Our doctor tried taking her but I guess his dog about tore her up so he said it just wasn’t a good fit. She was so happy to be home and I missed her so much for her only being gone for two days!!! I think we are still getting Aniyah (the red doxie) and I need to start looking for her. I want to potty train them both at the same time! And I’m also hoping that Elowyn takes to Aniyah like she is one of her own pups. Also in dog news, Edom and Rukka attacked our neighbor’s dog yesterday!!! They really tore that little guy up!!! Our neighbor is so mad right now and to be honest he has every right to be!!! He has now said that if our dogs go on his property that he will shoot them. Again he has every right to do that and as responsible dog owners we have to keep our dogs contained within our property. So we have to go buy a big dog pen because we have three really big dogs. For the moment they are staying locked up in the entry way of the house. I have to say they really don’t feel like they are being punished because they are in the cool of the house rather than the sweltering heat of the outside sun.
Also….Danny has really been hurting bad lately. He struggles with debilitating pain on a daily basis. He goes back to see his pain specialist and they are talking about doing some kind of internal implant that will vibrate his nerve endings and that will take away the pain. To be honest we have heard some really bad things about this device. It’s battery operated and so every so often you have to go back in for another surgery to replace the batteries. Danny doesn’t want anymore surgeries and I can’t say I blame him. But they have to figure out something to do for his pain. He has decided that pain pills are not an option because they can be so addictive. I think he made the right decision but there has to be some answer out there for his pain. I pray constantly that God will heal him from this pain, but this may be the thorn in his flesh. So please be praying for his pain. He isn’t sleeping at night and is also keeping me awake as he wants me to rub his neck and his lower back. Poor baby, he’s being such a trooper trying to deal with this but I know it wears on him.
I guess that’s all for now. I’ll try really hard not to stay gone so long. I looked at the blog site and I only did one post in June and so far this will be my second one in July. I use to post 30+ blogs a month when I was staying at home! I miss it so much!! Now I need to get up and do some cleaning! The house is a mess and it’s my own fault. I haven’t used my washer and dryer very much and the laundry is piling up again!! I wish I was a clean freak, but alas that is not how God made me lol!!! I’m lifting you all up in prayer and my love goes out to you all!!!
Melissa Fitzwilliam
Friday, July 16, 2010
We Need Your Prayers....
We have been going through a really hard time lately. The evil one is trying to do a number on us and God has allowed for certain things to happen. We are learning that God is sovereign in all things though a times we really wonder why we must endure these things. I can’t go into details because it’s of a personal nature but it’s safe to say we need your prayers. Not just Danny and I, but our girls also. We are trying to stay strong in the face of adversary, but I can say it isn’t easy. I feel like I’ve had the wind knocked out of me and I can’t catch my breath. I am happy to say that even despite all of the problems we have been going through my depression hasn’t gotten any worse, praise God!!!! However, I have had an amazing support system in our church family. They have rallied around us and kept us lifted up in prayer constantly!!! God has blessed us with them and I thank Him constantly for their unwavering love and support.
I could go into other things that have been going on, but there’s not much to tell outside of our current trial. I’ve had this whole week off to deal with this problem but it hasn’t felt like a week off. My work is being so considerate during this time and will let me take off as much time as I need to get things in order. It reminds me that God has me in the palm of His hand even when it comes to work. He has me right where He wants me and will work on me accordingly. I don’t just love what I do, I love the people there!! They are great Christians and they too have kept us in their prayers. God has led me to this job and I love Him for that. I try to recall a job that I’ve loved this much and the people I’ve loved this much and I can’t think of one! I’m truly content working and being right where God wants me.
Also please pray for some of our family members. They are not being supportive right now and some of them are being down right mean and spreading vicious rumors about us. If you hear of any of these rumors please message me so I can set the story straight. Things have been posted to facebook that should never been put on there!!! I can’t begin to tell you the anger I feel about this!!! Danny and I are both very upset over this!!! Some of the family has been very concerned and voiced their love for us and for that we are so thankful. To be honest it has been hard not to act on this anger but I know it’s not what the Lord wants of me or us. We have had to get to the point that we have to look past what people are saying and we are learning to ignore it. However, the girls haven’t been able to do that. The family’s words are hurting them and that’s another thing that makes this time extra hard. One of our girls has called a few people out on their post, but there are still things getting around that I’m not seeing. I just have to leave it in God’s hands and let Him deal with it.
If you have read this and are praying for us, I can’t begin to express my thanks!!! God will get us through this time, but we can never have enough prayers. Also know I am lifting you up in prayer also. We are blessed to have people in you in our lives!!! Danny and I both appreciate you all!!! If God opens an opportunity to share our current problem with you all I will share it with you, but for the moment I must respect my family’s wishes and keep it among us. Also please remember that if you do hear rumblings on facebook, please notify me. I would love to straighten out those who have the story wrong, but I will wait until they reach out to us first. I guess I’ve rambled on enough now with a vagueness that is probably irritating. Again thank you for your prayers and we love you all!!!
Melissa Fitzwilliam
I could go into other things that have been going on, but there’s not much to tell outside of our current trial. I’ve had this whole week off to deal with this problem but it hasn’t felt like a week off. My work is being so considerate during this time and will let me take off as much time as I need to get things in order. It reminds me that God has me in the palm of His hand even when it comes to work. He has me right where He wants me and will work on me accordingly. I don’t just love what I do, I love the people there!! They are great Christians and they too have kept us in their prayers. God has led me to this job and I love Him for that. I try to recall a job that I’ve loved this much and the people I’ve loved this much and I can’t think of one! I’m truly content working and being right where God wants me.
Also please pray for some of our family members. They are not being supportive right now and some of them are being down right mean and spreading vicious rumors about us. If you hear of any of these rumors please message me so I can set the story straight. Things have been posted to facebook that should never been put on there!!! I can’t begin to tell you the anger I feel about this!!! Danny and I are both very upset over this!!! Some of the family has been very concerned and voiced their love for us and for that we are so thankful. To be honest it has been hard not to act on this anger but I know it’s not what the Lord wants of me or us. We have had to get to the point that we have to look past what people are saying and we are learning to ignore it. However, the girls haven’t been able to do that. The family’s words are hurting them and that’s another thing that makes this time extra hard. One of our girls has called a few people out on their post, but there are still things getting around that I’m not seeing. I just have to leave it in God’s hands and let Him deal with it.
If you have read this and are praying for us, I can’t begin to express my thanks!!! God will get us through this time, but we can never have enough prayers. Also know I am lifting you up in prayer also. We are blessed to have people in you in our lives!!! Danny and I both appreciate you all!!! If God opens an opportunity to share our current problem with you all I will share it with you, but for the moment I must respect my family’s wishes and keep it among us. Also please remember that if you do hear rumblings on facebook, please notify me. I would love to straighten out those who have the story wrong, but I will wait until they reach out to us first. I guess I’ve rambled on enough now with a vagueness that is probably irritating. Again thank you for your prayers and we love you all!!!
Melissa Fitzwilliam
Monday, June 14, 2010
So Much To Tell!!!!
There has been so much that’s happened that there is no way I’m going to remember everything, but I’m going to try lol. I’ve had the past week off, but I’ve been so busy that I haven’t had a chance to get on here. I’m going to be off this next week too (yea!) because this is the time I have Ciara and Shannon. They are out for their two week visitation during the month of June and we’ll do this all over again the month of July. I love it when they are out here!! We have so much fun and stay so busy with them. We’ve had some great bonding moments and I praise God for that. Children are such a blessing and there are times I wonder why God chose me to bring them up in His ways when there are others out there that could do such a better job than I do. I guess, though, that I do try and He sees that. But enough of that now on to the latest!
I guess the biggest news is Danny bought me laser eye surgery for Mother’s Day, my birthday, and our anniversary! It was for all three (because they all fall in one month of each other) because it is a very expensive procedure and insurance won’t cover it because they consider it cosmetic. I don’t see how it’s cosmetic when your vision is as bad as mine was. But I went in a week ago Friday for the procedure, and I didn’t get Lasik because my cornea’s were so disfigured and that’s what was causing my stigmatism. The doctor said I could have been born with it or it was due from wearing contacts for such a long time. In any case I underwent a procedure called a PRK and rather than cutting the cornea they due the laser right on top of the eye and then smooth out the cornea. I received numbing eye drops but even with that it was pretty uncomfortable. However, if given the choice I would do it all over again!! Afterwards my eyes hurt so bad and all I wanted to do was sleep for four days. My vision right after was blurry and it was like having a bad pair of contacts in. My eyes were extremely light sensitive and they gave me a pair of polarized sunglasses. Now don’t ask me the difference between regular sunglasses and polarized, but I do know that the glasses felt great on lol!!! My vision is getting better with each passing day but it will take a full two months for it to completely heal and to see as clearly as I will. It’s hard to imagine because they are saying that I will be able to see things I have never seen before. Right now I can’t comprehend that but I’m so excited to finally be able to experience it!!
Danny’s retirement is going really well. He has already had a few jobs and he’s loving it! We now have all the equipment and he is fulfilling a lifelong dream by doing this! He has some more jobs coming up and we still need to do some advertising but I have just prayed that if this is what the Lord wants him to do that He would prosper us and give us all the jobs we can handle. I’ve gone with him a couple of times to job sites and we have a good time together. I went and got him a nice daily planner and organizer to help him keep tract of his hours, mileage, appointments, etc. We registered for our farm license and we should be getting that pretty soon so we won’t have to pay taxes on the feed we get and other things for the business since it’s farm related. It’s going really well and the Lord is really watching over us!
Well our washer finally went out the other day and it went out at such a bad time!! I haven’t done laundry in forever and I was planning (strongly stress the word planning lol) on doing some laundry this week. I told Danny what had happened and normally he can fix these things. However, not this time!! We are wondering if the flooding in our house caused it to short out, but Danny said even though we had standing water in the utility room he didn’t think insurance would cover it. So you think I would be excited about getting a new washer and dryer, and I guess I am, but all I hear when I think about it is cha-ching $$$$!!!!! Danny is hoping by getting me a new set that I will take to liking doing laundry more, but I don’t know about that hahaha. He did get me a very nice set though; he takes such good care of me!!!
Oh which reminds me!!! When we got the major hailstorm it destroyed our pool so insurance covered part of it so we are getting a new one! Danny was looking at pools while I was working and when I got out of work he called me to see if I wanted to come approve the pool that he had picked out. So I drove over there and the pool he picked out is so nice!!!! He then asked me if I wanted to go look at some toys and I said sure. So we are walking over and he stops at a hot tub and ask if I’d like it as a toy. I said sure! Then I replied that we couldn’t afford it and I asked him if he was joking. He said yeah he was joking so I was like OK. Then he says what if he wasn’t joking? So again I asked him if he was joking or not. He says yes, I mean no…and he had this huge smile on his face. So he buys me a hot tub!!! I can’t tell you how long I wanted one!!! I don’t love him because of what he buys me or what he does for me…I love his heart and how he loves me! He’s always thinking of what will make me happy and goes to the Nth degree to supply for me what I want and what I need. His love amazes me!!!
Let’s see what else has happened??? My mom had her grand opening for her hair salon on Saturday and it was a smashing success!! I was really happy for her. The relationship between her and Danny is still very stressed and I just pray she comes around soon. Also the girls and I have been swimming at the local pool (even though I’m not very much fun because I can’t get my face wet because of the eye surgery) and we are going to play racquet ball. Racquet ball seems to be our new obsession and we love hitting the ball around and just having a good time. We love laughing with each other and at each other lol. We have so much fun and we are getting a workout while we are doing it. Ciara swears I’ve lost some weight but I can’t tell it. Danny had talked about taking me on a trip to Mexico to the beach, but with all the problems going on down there we didn’t dare try it. We are also getting a new miniature dachshund as soon as we sell Hannah. We are getting a red female and her name will be Anayah. I’m so excited to have another new puppy to spoil although I must say I will be so sad to see Hannah go!! She has wiggled her way into my heart and she is just precious!! She looks so much like her daddy Asher and someone will make some good money off of her puppies!! I really wanted to keep her, but that would required me getting another Isabella (that’s a suede color) male and I’m afraid that Asher would hurt another male because he’s so territorial. So I will consider getting another Isabella female and I’m pretty sure her name will be Abigail. But that’s later on so I won’t worry about it right now.
I guess other than that I’m just working on working weeks and hanging out with the family. I’m loving life and feeling great. I’ve gone out with Megan a few nights and had a blast with her. I’m trying to curb my shopping and I’m working on building self-control because I am really lacking at it when it comes to my work and buying clothes there. Sorry this turned out to be so long, but there was so much to share! I pray for you all daily and hope you are doing well. May the good Lord bless you and keep you! Much love to you all!!!!
Melissa Fitzwilliam
I guess the biggest news is Danny bought me laser eye surgery for Mother’s Day, my birthday, and our anniversary! It was for all three (because they all fall in one month of each other) because it is a very expensive procedure and insurance won’t cover it because they consider it cosmetic. I don’t see how it’s cosmetic when your vision is as bad as mine was. But I went in a week ago Friday for the procedure, and I didn’t get Lasik because my cornea’s were so disfigured and that’s what was causing my stigmatism. The doctor said I could have been born with it or it was due from wearing contacts for such a long time. In any case I underwent a procedure called a PRK and rather than cutting the cornea they due the laser right on top of the eye and then smooth out the cornea. I received numbing eye drops but even with that it was pretty uncomfortable. However, if given the choice I would do it all over again!! Afterwards my eyes hurt so bad and all I wanted to do was sleep for four days. My vision right after was blurry and it was like having a bad pair of contacts in. My eyes were extremely light sensitive and they gave me a pair of polarized sunglasses. Now don’t ask me the difference between regular sunglasses and polarized, but I do know that the glasses felt great on lol!!! My vision is getting better with each passing day but it will take a full two months for it to completely heal and to see as clearly as I will. It’s hard to imagine because they are saying that I will be able to see things I have never seen before. Right now I can’t comprehend that but I’m so excited to finally be able to experience it!!
Danny’s retirement is going really well. He has already had a few jobs and he’s loving it! We now have all the equipment and he is fulfilling a lifelong dream by doing this! He has some more jobs coming up and we still need to do some advertising but I have just prayed that if this is what the Lord wants him to do that He would prosper us and give us all the jobs we can handle. I’ve gone with him a couple of times to job sites and we have a good time together. I went and got him a nice daily planner and organizer to help him keep tract of his hours, mileage, appointments, etc. We registered for our farm license and we should be getting that pretty soon so we won’t have to pay taxes on the feed we get and other things for the business since it’s farm related. It’s going really well and the Lord is really watching over us!
Well our washer finally went out the other day and it went out at such a bad time!! I haven’t done laundry in forever and I was planning (strongly stress the word planning lol) on doing some laundry this week. I told Danny what had happened and normally he can fix these things. However, not this time!! We are wondering if the flooding in our house caused it to short out, but Danny said even though we had standing water in the utility room he didn’t think insurance would cover it. So you think I would be excited about getting a new washer and dryer, and I guess I am, but all I hear when I think about it is cha-ching $$$$!!!!! Danny is hoping by getting me a new set that I will take to liking doing laundry more, but I don’t know about that hahaha. He did get me a very nice set though; he takes such good care of me!!!
Oh which reminds me!!! When we got the major hailstorm it destroyed our pool so insurance covered part of it so we are getting a new one! Danny was looking at pools while I was working and when I got out of work he called me to see if I wanted to come approve the pool that he had picked out. So I drove over there and the pool he picked out is so nice!!!! He then asked me if I wanted to go look at some toys and I said sure. So we are walking over and he stops at a hot tub and ask if I’d like it as a toy. I said sure! Then I replied that we couldn’t afford it and I asked him if he was joking. He said yeah he was joking so I was like OK. Then he says what if he wasn’t joking? So again I asked him if he was joking or not. He says yes, I mean no…and he had this huge smile on his face. So he buys me a hot tub!!! I can’t tell you how long I wanted one!!! I don’t love him because of what he buys me or what he does for me…I love his heart and how he loves me! He’s always thinking of what will make me happy and goes to the Nth degree to supply for me what I want and what I need. His love amazes me!!!
Let’s see what else has happened??? My mom had her grand opening for her hair salon on Saturday and it was a smashing success!! I was really happy for her. The relationship between her and Danny is still very stressed and I just pray she comes around soon. Also the girls and I have been swimming at the local pool (even though I’m not very much fun because I can’t get my face wet because of the eye surgery) and we are going to play racquet ball. Racquet ball seems to be our new obsession and we love hitting the ball around and just having a good time. We love laughing with each other and at each other lol. We have so much fun and we are getting a workout while we are doing it. Ciara swears I’ve lost some weight but I can’t tell it. Danny had talked about taking me on a trip to Mexico to the beach, but with all the problems going on down there we didn’t dare try it. We are also getting a new miniature dachshund as soon as we sell Hannah. We are getting a red female and her name will be Anayah. I’m so excited to have another new puppy to spoil although I must say I will be so sad to see Hannah go!! She has wiggled her way into my heart and she is just precious!! She looks so much like her daddy Asher and someone will make some good money off of her puppies!! I really wanted to keep her, but that would required me getting another Isabella (that’s a suede color) male and I’m afraid that Asher would hurt another male because he’s so territorial. So I will consider getting another Isabella female and I’m pretty sure her name will be Abigail. But that’s later on so I won’t worry about it right now.
I guess other than that I’m just working on working weeks and hanging out with the family. I’m loving life and feeling great. I’ve gone out with Megan a few nights and had a blast with her. I’m trying to curb my shopping and I’m working on building self-control because I am really lacking at it when it comes to my work and buying clothes there. Sorry this turned out to be so long, but there was so much to share! I pray for you all daily and hope you are doing well. May the good Lord bless you and keep you! Much love to you all!!!!
Melissa Fitzwilliam
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